Race Report: Run for the Spring Wardrobe (FAI Hip Surgery Part 4)

So, week 6 on the death sticks - and it is Spring (finally).
One thing I have noticed since before my surgery in mid April, sadly, has been a massive loss of any sense of time: viz [which is Latin for "namely" - I have to justify my law degree on occasion], I went into the hospital on blustery rainy, winter day and suddenly it is late May - and sunny/warm/green and 28 degrees C.
And so I never got to wear my "Spring wardrobe" [ya, that sounds kinda fey even to me]; I noticed last weekend that all my running gear is laid out for winter/spring training & racing: gloves, hats, buffs, tights, jackets, etc. And yet, if I was suddenly allowed to start running tomorrow, I could easily head out in shorts/singlet/and yes, my trusty visor - alas, I am not yet running, so the idea is somewhat academic.
But, as usual, I digress.

I have been hard at rehab/recovery since the (external) stitches came out last month - swimming 3-4 days a week, water running, rehab exercises in the deep end of the pool, physio, chillaxing...
But the most fun [kidding] has been my twice daily spins on my(road) bike - on my indoor Computrainer.

you should always ride with a helmet

Let me begin by noting I have never had such a sore butt in my life, as unlike riding outside, on the trainer, you don't move much, especially when ordered by your surgeon too not "screw" up all his incredibly delicate surgical mastery; I was told, emphatically, "not to walk / run /  put your right leg on the ground at all or on your bike pedals with any pressure (and while I have valiantly attempted to follow that edict, I have, on occasion, slipped into near-full-on pedalling) or you will tear out your anchors.Tear. Out. Your. Anchors."

one of six new anchors screwed into my hip

And so when riding, all your weight is on your butt as it sits on one spot on a saddle that is 5/8" at its widest, for the entire ride - until you cry, like an aging boxer, "no mas" (shout out to Nurse Ratched in Barthelona!). Upon reflection, if I had been blessed with a more bountiful booty [I Like big Butts - not mine though...] instead of the ratty bony ass I have, maybe this wouldn't be such an ordeal.

not Johnny's butt

So for the most part, my daily indoor trainer rides have been, pun intended, pedestrian: my wattage has crescendoed on most days at a massive 100 watts (to put this in perspective: Team Sky's Ian Boswell: power readings from Tour of California (last week) where Boswell cracked out 388 watts on the last recorded stage. Ya, I realize I am, and remain, a punter.

this is how I feel riding on my trainer

Given that while I had entered but was forced to miss all the Spring road racing, like: the famous Sporting life 10km (with a major shout out to my friend and race director Cory F who put together a fantastic race this year!!); Goodlife Marathon, where I was to head out on the 5km; and John Salt's awesome Multisport Canada triathlon series, with the season opener in Woodstock this past weekend - I was seriously bummed about not only not being able to race, but missing out on all the comradarie of seeing all the old boys/gals I race with every Spring/Summer.

However....and yes, there is a point to this blog today - I did want, in the recent tradition of all modern racers, to update you with a blog piece about the epic event I was able to take part in last weekend, here in Toronto: the 1st Annual Run for the Spring Wardrobe.
This heretofore previously unheralded event is actually a Spring Classic, one which many taken part in - without even possibly realizing it.
So here is a recap of the 2 day, multi-stage event:
DAY 1: The Hipster 3 Miler
The day began with me laying out all my gear: Crutches? Check. Dark sunglasses to avoid the sun (and eye contact with any bearded urban hipsters)? Check. Water bottle rigged on crutches for continuos hydration - and safety spraying of said bearded urban hipsters when they get within my drafting zone of 7 meters? Check. Massively expensive hip brace? Check. Spare Oxy? Nope - what if I do well and there is drug testing after...? How do you spell "Lance".
At 1pm my trusty driver took me to the race start at Bathurst and Queen, where we found a great spot to set up - race conditions, however, were dicey with the possibility of rain, but, what are we athletes if not tough and ready for anything? And before I knew it, Day 1 was on! We walked/crutched thru probably every single boutique/shoe store/designer store/purse store/shoe store/ on Queen West...EVERY. SINGLE.  ONE.  While this was not an Ironman distance event, it certainly felt like it could be a long, tough day.

I am a dead man

Moving on crutches thru the (Saturday) crowds was remarkably similar to weaving thru the wave starts in an Ironman swim / bike - it required speed, dexterity, poise, patience and most of all, cunning strength. But I had brought my "A" game for Day 1, and aside from a few hiccups - stumbling on curbs, wicked sore hands from 3 hrs on the death sticks, and, being polite in the face of repeated "oh my God  - what did you do???" I finished the day strong but a little weary - and Nurse Ratched was likewise thrilled with her results.
DAY 2: The Suburban Mall Indoor Meet
Like Bill Murray in "Groundhog Day", Day 2 was eerily similar to Day 1 - with the exception that today's event was an indoor meet, taking part in the august halls of that athletic colossus, "Yorkdale".
Needless to say the day unfolded remarkably like Day 1 [reference: Groundhog Day"]. To be honest, I have little memory of what unfolded on Day 2, as I was fading hard after 3 hours -  but I dug deep and managed to pull off, yet again, a really strong finish. Thankfully I kept an eye on nutrition and hydration and with a brief stop to take in a gel, and some 'tater tots I had in my pocket, we were good to go.

race ready nutrition

So, there it is: the Spring Classic "Run for the wardrobe" is sure to be an annual event,  and yet surprisingly similar in scope and effort to those other seasonal Classics: the Summer, then Fall, then Winter "RFTSW".
All Classics - all the time. Every year.
And I wouldn't have it any other way.
:)

Can you tell I really, really need to get off these crutches?
See ya out there shopping
Mellow Johhny